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HAHA WOW SO LAME! [29 Jan 2006|11:25pm]
haha WOW I just read all this shit it's like blah i like caleb blah i like rocky blah blah blah blah wow it's funny how pitiful last summer was! There was so much bullshit and so much confusion!! But thats ok in the end I have someone great... Rocky has some one great.. caleb is alone getting fucked over all the time! MWAHAHAHAHAHA haha Nah cabe and me are friends but it just shows want comes around goes around!!
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[29 Jan 2006|11:06pm]
[ mood | happy ]

well ya i haven't been on this thing in FOREVER! But I just wanted to post and say ya I'm dating Mike since 1.12.06 and he's the greatest thing ever!!! ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ .... so definately falling in love with him :)

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[30 Oct 2005|01:24am]
I read an old entry... and you know i really hate when i do stupid shit that i extremely regret because i get scared... I hate that the only person I have every truely loved hates me....
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[09 Oct 2005|11:23pm]
Wow i haven't updated in a while... I've been busy with volleyball and homecoming.. my dress and hair and all that looked good and homecoming was fun... the volleyball season is going pretty good, we're 18-2 so uhh ya good night.
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WOO FUCKING HOO [06 Sep 2005|10:26pm]
[ mood | sleepy! ]

We beat hedgisville tonight! I'm so happy because i fucking hate them! The players and the parents are fucking cocky bitches! I think i played like shit but everyone else said i did well idk maybe i'm too hard on myself! ERR and I'm getting sick and some fucking girl came under the net when i blocked her and hit me and i fucking landed weird and hurrt my back! WTF! STUPID BIG EARRED BITCH!!!! Ok well i'm starving and i need a shower and some sleep so later ♥!

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WOOT WOOT! [18 Aug 2005|12:25am]
[ mood | extatic! ]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!! I'M SO HAPPY!! *SLAPS YOU IN THE FACE* YOU SHOULD BE HAPPY TOO! I'VE BEEN "SET FREE" WELL AT LEAST THATS HOW I FEEL NOW AND IT'S FUCKING GREAT! ♥ I LOVE IT!! :D

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[18 Aug 2005|12:10am]
Wow nothing has really been going on lately.. a lot of volleyball! I'm going shopping tomorrow to get a bunch of new clothes and shit for school. I'm excited now but i know after i try on like a million clothes i'll get mad and annoyed! But uh ya hmmm idk ♥
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New Pictures ♥ [15 Aug 2005|10:51pm]
[ mood | content ]

Read more...Collapse )

1 Beautiful Oblivions

It got better but only after it got EXTREMELY worse? [15 Aug 2005|12:59am]
[ mood | happy ]

Ok well last night around 1am I went over to Helenas and hung out with her and rocky, I really needed to get out of the house because of what all happened with Caleb. Rocky and I picked on each other like always and he bit my arm 2ce and shoulder blade and I still have red marks! We were just messing with my cell phone and hanging out Rocky and I beating each other up like always ♥ Rocky was sitting between my legs so he could lean back on me and helena and i kept pinching his nipples saying he needed to get the ticks off of him.. it was funny then helena wanted a cigarette so rocky had it and we started going around in a circle well half a circle and putting it in each others mouths and with rocky it was ok because it wouldn't be the 1st time ive gotten mouth to mouth with him with my mouth open but then i gave it to helena and it was fucking weird but it stopped at helena cause she was like i'm not doing that to my brother! It was fun though and then we were all laying on the ground and helena was like OMG steph i need your flashlight on your phone so she was looking on the ground and there was a dead bunny! haha it was gross! then we all layed down in her drive way and i layed my head on rockys stomach for a pillow while we talked about all kinds of stuff and some how started talking about shaving and all kinds of stuff it was weird but then again it's Helena rocky and i.. what do you expect?! but rocky and i ended up cuddling and what not and idk it was so cute.. he made me feel bad because he was like "ya, she just went to caleb because i was picking on her" i felt so bad... Idk I just wanted to something new but it wasn't worth it and it definatly wasn't worth losing what rocky and i have always had. He's so perfect for me and we have so much fun together he's awesome but yet idk we have so much past of dating and breaking up but then again i understand it's just a distance thing... blah blah blah I bet no one will read this but it's ok I don't care this is pretty much jsut something for me to look back on. but ya by the end of it Helena had pee'd in the middle of the street and rocky and I were cuddling in the driveway kissing and being dumb like always and he didn't want me to leave... idk I'm just extremely happy things are back to the way they have been with Rocky and I because it would be weird if it wasn't and he means so much to me and I really don't want to lose the little that we do have together. ♥

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Stamped [14 Aug 2005|12:36am]
[ mood | crushed ]

Sorry I haven't been very active I had volleyball tryouts last week and now I'm out of town and I forgot to post.. but the camera is working finally so i'll start taking bunches of pictures :)

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[14 Aug 2005|12:33am]
[ mood | crushed ]

Hmm Caleb is a fucking prick! I'm not going to go into detail because i know there is ONE person that reads this that would enjoy it a lot but I'm just going to leave this for me as a memory.... but I've lost all trust for everyone except Noel of course I love her! she always knows how to make me feel better!

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Volleyball [10 Aug 2005|07:40pm]
[ mood | happy ]

Woo Hoo try outs are FINALLY over! But we still have practice everyday :-( I made the team.. go figure... and about all this stuff with Caleb who knows! But I'm going to Penn this weekend and we're going to hang out all day saturday! :-) even though he may have a few rough spots like a certain OVER addiction he's still absolutly perfect <3 :-)

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AHHH FUCK [04 Aug 2005|03:55pm]
[ mood | CRYING MY FUCKING HEART OUT!!!! ]

I'm done with caleb i can't stand this 2nd best shit if really cared like he said he did he might actually tell jychelle about whats been going on even though they're not dating but you know what fuck that i can't take it i just want to fucking die :(

1 Beautiful Oblivions

[04 Aug 2005|03:33am]
[ mood | PISSED ]

AHHH I"M FUCKING PISSED OFF..But thats all I"m going to say.. GUYS ARE STUPID FUCKS!

Kisses are never safe when residue of old love is left
how could I feel lesser when someone better
walks around / waiting for you to call out
As your cold hand grasps mine I feel unright
and privileged to be able to look
in your eyes / same chemical as stars
Deformed fingers leave trails of hearts in writing
could three words be the end to births only meaning
Crying to sleep is my remedy
urgently trying to stand on broken / confused legs
Am I looking for reasons not to be happy
emotions catch up with me / I'm too fast for them ♥

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[31 Jul 2005|02:51am]
Blah blah blah.. I wish i could tell Caleb how much me means to me :-/
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[30 Jul 2005|02:36am]
[ mood | happy ]

I watched 10 things I hate about you for the first time tonight with my sister's friend and it made me realized how much ***** means to me.. I know I'm such a loser for thinking about it but it was just little things in the movie that reminded me of him and i was like wow this kid really is perfect.. You know how usually you just find little flaws about people and trust me I'm good at it but I haven't found one yet... he's just perfect simple as that... He said if I lived closer he would probably ask me out and even though we can't date it's the fact that he even said that and the fact that he said I was perfect for him wow :-) he was like ya 2 people told me that you didn't need a freak to be happy and he was like i mean look at you, you look like a normal person when you're standing next to me I was just like man why can't i be up there... a year and a half but by then he'll probably like someone else or moved or something.. Idk I just wish I could fully tell him how I feel but I don't know I don't want to scare him off or idk he's just so perfect for me and him being a freak is just so hot! but uhhh I'm happy no one really reads this so I can poor my heart and soul into this! haha i'm so fucking stupid he does lives 3 hours away but uuhh just talking to him is amazing and idk he's so caring and I love so much to make him happy and it meant a lot when he said that I ceise to amaze him I was like yay well i didn't tell him that I just told him I'd always find a way to amaze him... but ok I'm going on and on and well ahhh He's so fucking perfect!!!! ok ok I give I'm done :-)

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[29 Jul 2005|01:35am]
[ mood | ecstatic ]

AHH I GIVE IN CALEB IS MY FUCKING GOD!! <3 SCREW ROCKY AND HIS MEANESS AND ALL THAT CALEB IS MY GOD.. ENOUGH SAID :-D <3

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GRR I'M PISSED!! [28 Jul 2005|08:34pm]
[ mood | Pissed! ]

Ok well lets see.. I"m supposed to go Penn. this weekend and stay for the week and hang out with Caleb and Rocky and Helena and work things out with Tim and all that but my grandparents arn't going to be there thursday and friday night and I dont think I have anyone to stay with! If it wasn't for my sister I could probably stay with Helena or maybe even Caleb if his parents talked it over but then again seeing as my grandparents probably wouldn't approve plus Helena is probably going to Hidden Valley.. I swear I"m going to fucking flip if i can't go up there because this is my last week of summer before volleyball starts back up and I want to make it a good one!! GRRRR You just don't understand how upset this makes me! I'll stay with my mom's grandma as long as I get to be up there to see all them plus when my parents come up sunday I'd go back to my grandparents house and stay there even though they're not there... AHHHH I'm pissed but concidering no one cares I'll stop tell you... Later

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[28 Jul 2005|06:13pm]
[ mood | drained ]

UHH Coach Martz e-mailed me! I still have to get my physical I keep forgetting and Putting it off so this is kind of a reminder... PLUS tryouts are the 8th at 8 in the morning and he said be there early!! AHHH this fucking sucks this is the worse time of the year.. TRYOUTS... I know I've made the team but it's the hell he puts us through and I know he enjoys it!

Jeeze I talked to Rocky for a couple hours today and he was being mean/picking on me like he always does.. I'll never quite understand that kid because even though he's so mean to me sometimes he always tells me he loves me when he gets off the phone.. It's so frustrating!

then after I got off the phone with him I checked my messages on my cell phone and Caleb called so I talked to him for a little while till Tim showed up and he had to go work at the farm... HAHA he has to go load hay! Sucks for him but oh well he's my buddy but thats what he gets for messing with me like he does!

Alright <3s thats all :)

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[26 Jul 2005|07:07pm]
[ mood | content ]

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